wasn’t expecting this
but arent you glad it hapened
its ears ITS EARS ITS EARS ITS EARS
floomph
oh my god
(Source: caturday)
SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
you came to the wrong neigh-bourhood, motherfucker
THE FUCKING DOG I CANT BREAHE
(Source: voldegort)
AH
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY? :O
When you’re dancing to music:
and you think you’re all sexy and have badass moves like:
But in reality you’re like:
(Source: m-pendragon)
my mom was pulling into a parking space today and she asked “am i relatively straight?” and i said “i think that’s something you need to decide for yourself” and she told me to walk home
Apparently, jokingly spreading your legs when the dentist says “Open wide” is FROWNED UPON IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT.
Things that I write:
- Sins
Things that I don’t write:
- Tragedies
Things people haven’t heard of
- Closing the god damn door
Things the Bride is:
- A whore
Things I wouldn’t be caught dead in:
- This Place
(Source: anondracomalfoy)
how does the math book say goodbye?
calculater
