and you think you’re all sexy and have badass moves like:
But in reality you’re like:
my mom was pulling into a parking space today and she asked “am i relatively straight?” and i said “i think that’s something you need to decide for yourself” and she told me to walk home
Apparently, jokingly spreading your legs when the dentist says “Open wide” is FROWNED UPON IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT.
Things that I write:
Things that I don’t write:
Things people haven’t heard of
- Closing the god damn door
Things the Bride is:
- A whore
Things I wouldn’t be caught dead in:
- This Place
how does the math book say goodbye?